Dance Baby Dance – A Drama in Three Acts

Act 1: Maoist Central Committee Meeting

The central committee meeting ended inconclusively.

Party chairman Puspa Kamal Dahal “Prachanda” and party’s ideologue Mohan Baidhya “Kiran” had presented two separate political proposals to determine the party’s future direction. Prachanda proposed a “Transitional Democratic Republic” model; Kiran proposed a radical “People’s Republic through Revolt” model*.

After days of meeting, the committee members could not resolve on which proposal to endorse. They are to have a discussion of the issue in the party’s general assembly, scheduled for some time next year.

At least that’s what people have been told.

Though, there’s a seeming “rift” among the Maoist central members – one for Prachanda+Baburam, another for Kiran+Gajurel. However, it was not that hard to comprehend that the rift is all but well designed propaganda, with media acting like a complete jerk.

Nepali Congress – it almost rejoiced on the news of the “rift” in the Maoist party. Opportunist, yet completely gullible!

Act 2: Maoists Cadres’ National Convention

Divided into 21 groups, some 1200 Maoist cadres got all set to discuss and finalize one of the two proposals.

Kiran’s proposal of declaring People’s Republic through a Revolt – appealed to those hard-ass-liners, radicals and extremists on the party’s frontline. Prachanda’s proposal seemed to appeal to those slightly drifting from the hardcore radicalism who had already started to grasp the idea – “you need to lick balls of the neighbors and power-nations to be in the power and when you get tired of licking balls, lick it all over again”.

So they discussed. For two days.

In the meantime, the “rift” was highlighted with jubilation in media. It was, they said, inevitable! The party is on the shameful brink of disintegration.

The designers must have had a good laugh.

Act 3: People’s Federal Democratic National Republic**

In an extraordinary turn of events, the party convention endorses Prachanda’s proposal. After five days of discussion, which had the whole nation gawking with full attention, the party cadres and central committee members agree to follow Prachanda’s proposal as the party’s future direction.

Baburam Bhattarai, thutey junga musaardai, said that the party is disintegration-proof and it will initiate its people centric work from the government, parliament and street. (What’s stopping you.. do it… please do it. Shut up and do it.)

After making everyone dance to their tune for five continuous days, the top heads ended the convention with a revolutionary exclamation mark – everyone one of them danced on the stage***.

Nothing is so delightful than a successful drama – a well executed and directed farce in three acts.
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* The concept seems as ridiculous as the first ever wall president of Republic of Nepal – Prachanda. Kiran should be out of his mind. His proposal: People’s Republic through Revolt? Revolt – what revolt! His party is in the government, for Hanumaan’s sake! Has any one heard of any government revolting against itself? Revolt – for whom? for what? Ruling party revolting against what?

It beats me with its profound idiocy. The concept is palin stupid. Period.

** Somehow, it’s going to be hard for kids remembering our country’s name:
PFDNR of Nepal.

***

Vikashananda opts for a Knock Out

(Maoist chairman Prachanda and Vikashananda during the inauguration program of a new building of Manokranti Matrix in Godawari. March 9, 2008)

I have never played Boxing – but I can imagine how a boxer might feel like when, out of a sudden and out of a freaking blue – you receive a sucker punch that knocks you out cold for good.

THIS was the “sucker punch” move (almost) perfectly executed by Vikashananda on the Nepali media. Wait, plan and execute. Ingenious!

Manokranti = Bare Ass Propaganda

(I am writing this with extreme respect for meditation and yoga)

Last week, some lucky people of Kathmandu witnessed a glorious farce in front of the Gorkhapatra Corporation, New Road where a bunch of Manokranti followers stripped naked and protested against the Nepali media for not publishing news about their numerous – what they claimed as – “incredible feats”.

They were holding placards written “Stop Yellow Journalism”, “where is the news about world cycle tour”, “where is the news about underground meditation”, “where is the news about walking on the fire”, “where is the news about 12 hours continuous speech”, “where is the news of Manokrantiversity” and also demanded “National acknowledgement/approval for Manokranti Philosophy” among others.

I do not care who this character “Dr. Yogi Vikashananda” is – nor do I care what his “vision”, “teaching” and “philosophy” are. I have nothing against his personal life and activities. He is entitled to his freedom of speech, opinion and pursuit. I do not care what his definition of “manokranti” (translation = revolution of self) is, nor do I care what they do inside their Manokranti Matrix Gurukul.

“Lip-Sync” for Career

(The top ten contestants of Nepali Tara 2 performing, dancing and lip-sync-ing at the Public High School, Dharan on September 2007. Photo by Bijay Gajmer.)

“Lip-Sync” for Career
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